I am looking for that buzz. I am searching for those endorphins. One idea is that they are there, inside me. I need not expend all of my energy in a quest for their source. It is right in front of my eyes, really.
I self-medicate. In all sorts of ways. But in my efforts I am masking the natural remedy which is here. I think I am a peaceful man, but instead I am fighting any truths which I am privy to. I am a ludicrous warrior. How boring. No wonder I am so often bored. Fight, fight, fight. How monotonous.

originally published on 6/22/08