I definitely need to experiment with some higher power options. I remember when my atheistic propensities were put on the back burner and I was consulting with Him/It for some solace and support and direction in the recent past. It truly did help for awhile. I think I need to be open to some possibilities, and not let my concern for semantics be a total block for acceptance of wisdom of a certain nature.
God I had weird dreams. So vivid when you’ve overeaten and you’re not sleeping very soundly. I would write it down if I could get a good handle on the details in my conscious mind. John W, weird sheet music issues, winding staircases, musical colleagues.

My latest thinking concept for playing knottedness is my brain stem. It seems to be medical, internal and compellingly scary in enough of a way to get me going in a better direction physically and otherwise. I just remember that I am a product of the fact of human biology, which includes things such as a brain stem inside my head and neck. This is an immutable situation, regardless of whatever I may feel or however I may want to contort myself. As long as I am breathing/alive, I have an active brain stem. Which I find a bit gross to contemplate. But this may be helpful in keeping my attention.

The point is, with this in mind I can acquire a balance within myself. I have a focus that is basically not harmful. Sadly, that is often not the case. Maybe it’s a little like a higher power option to which I refer above. Human biology.

originally published on 11/27/06