What does it take? Ha ha. Glacial. That’s a fact. I’d loathe to think I’m back where I started, with Harriet. What qualifies as progress? I’d loathe to think I’m writing for nearly nothing. I wonder if I can emulate the Men of a Certain Age guys and do some male bonding to cure my ills. Is that who Dick represented for me? The rare male bonding example? Life is glacial. I still haven’t figured that out? Cody is a perfect example of non glaciality. He is so pliable. Like Stretch Man. Can I take after him? I was hoping to regress, after all.

It’s hard to know whether to regress, stay absolutely still, or progress. Maybe I’m pliable enough to have some choices still. Staying absolutely still is kind of nice. To savor the moment, not worry. Not worry about regressing or progressing. Just be. Just appreciate.

It’s so quiet, appreciating the moment. The now. I wasn’t raised to appreciate the mundane, was I? The mundane moment. Ha ha.

But look at today. Didn’t I do that fairly well? What could be more mundane that jury duty? Hmm? I think I came away pretty grounded in the now. In reality. Certainly by my standard of comparison. I can appreciate that. Right? I can appreciate my accomplishment in that arena. I made small talk. I stayed on target with the goings on. I allowed for mundanity. It was ok. I didn’t have to be in the spotlight (most of the time). And I felt something. I felt some compassion. I felt something that wasn’t about me. I felt sympathy. I felt anger. I felt a lot of things. I was a real human being. Interesting. At least I verged on it. Honesty, as Joe says.

So many beautiful mundane people in the world. I hate them. Because I envy them. I hate their savant-like ability – to not be a savant. All the mundane people, where do they all come from? All the mundane people, where do they all belong?

And not to get synchronicity-ish, but the fact that I was the very last juror to join the jury, that I just barely got edged in by a fluke of numerology, with the odds and my own self will rooting against me — is that the universe saying something about my novice-ness for this normalcy stuff? With it only tenuously allowing me to participate in this kind of process, where patience, quiet focus, and some level of compassion are the key elements.